Santa Hats and Flip Flops

I'm back! I apologize for the delay, I've been experiencing some technical difficulties recently! Now, for your regularly scheduled post...

It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas, everywhere you go...

Except for Houston. Sure, there is a three-story Christmas tree up at the Galleria over the indoor skating rink, there are Christmas lights and dancing santas and pumped-in Christmas music, but it's 80 degrees and sunny. "Let it Snow" came on the radio on my way home from school yesterday and I burst out laughing. The weather outside IS frightful... but a fire would NOT be delightful.

I absolutely love the holidays, and the preparations for Christmas are the best part for me! I have found that the joy of anticipation is where I find grace- finding the perfect gift, looking at the Christmas tree, and watching Elf over and over again to fill in the blank spots that I may have forgotten every word to since my last viewing.

I absolutely LOVE the Advent season. I have actually been counting down the weeks until Advent each week at mass since early September, and I'm so happy it's finally here! I love lighting the candles on the Advent wreath, and the special kind of prayer that Advent brings. "O Come O Come Emmanuel" was not the first song at mass last week, and I almost had a fit. They thankfully recovered by singing it at the offertory, but I was getting really nervous.

Advent is all about waiting. Waiting for the light in the darkness, for God's gift to the world. It's a reminder that we can find joy in waiting, even in our constant impatience. I need this reminder around this time each year, but I'm feeling it especially this year.

Life as an East Coast-er in the South is sometimes a challenge. Life moves a lot slower. People talk slower, drive a LOT slower, and move at a generally slower pace. My patience is not exactly my strongest suit, and this fact has shown itself in my community, while I'm driving, and in my classroom time and time again. I'm learning to relax, but I haven't been able to find the joy in waiting in my day to day life as much as I find the joy in Advent. It's a work in progress.

So, I'm challenging myself for the last 13 days that stand between me and an airplane to Philadelphia- find the joy of waiting, of living in the PRESENT. I know that getting home, spending time with family and friends, will FILL me with joy, but I need to remember that I'm only here for a year, and somewhere in this city, I can find joy.

I found a little today, as Cristo Rey Jesuit had a Christmas party for kids from Texas Children's Hospital. Drama had a little station set up where my students read Christmas stories to the children. As I looked at the bench full of students, who I know have less than ideal lives to begin with, reading "How The Grinch Stole Christmas" to fifteen little kids, my eyes filled with tears. My students are amazingly generous, giving up their Saturdays to read what they discovered was actually a pretty long book to little kids. I'm so proud of them. Not that I was feeling grinchy at all, but to quote Dr. Seuss, I swear that my heart grew ten sizes today.

So, I found joy for today. Hopefully Christmas activities in the Heights section of Houston tonight will continue to put me in the holiday spirit, even if I am wearing flip flops.


Enjoy this rendition of "O Come O Come Emmanuel" by The Civil Wars!

Realization: I'm Ruined

Part Two of Recent Events: DALLAS!

After all the turkey and treats, we JVs settled in for a long winter's nap. But this JV was too excited to sleep- for the first time since late July, she'd see her family the next morning!! It had been so long, the longest in fact, I'd ever gone without seeing my mom and dad! They came to visit me in Ireland sooner than this, so while I have an incredible, amazing new community here in Houston, I was really missing my family.

There's only so much Skype and phone conversations can bring- I was really struggling with feeling so much further away from my parents than I was used to, and a drive to Dallas was all that separated me from them. Woohoo!

I left our house around 10:30, after sadly saying goodbye to the San Antonio JVs, I hit I-45. The drive to Dallas from Houston is about the same mileage as Philadelphia to Providence, with significantly less traffic and higher speed limits. It's actually just significantly LESS in general- once you get out of the Houston Metro area, there is absolutely NOTHING. I drove through small Texan towns (Fairfield, TX, population 3,094), saw oil drills, and lots and lots of Texas longhorns.

About an hour and a half from Houston, the landscape really changed. Suddenly it was all big sky, but instead of the landscape just being green and brown, there was COLOR! I FOUND FALL IN TEXAS! The leaves were red, orange, and yellow- what a sight for sore eyes :).

I continued traveling through the cowfields, passed signs for "Cowboys for Christ" and the Cowboy Church, complete with a place to tie up your horse, and all of a sudden, like I was Dorothy making my way to Oz, Dallas appeared in front of me! Another 40 minutes and I was in Southlake, TX, where Kevin, Susan, and Conor live!

I got to see my Aunt Susan and her husband Jim as well, it was a great family reunion! After driving to Love Field to pick up my mom and dad, we all went out to a delicious authentic Mexican dinner and planned the next day's events.

It was so surreal to be with my parents in Dallas- it was great to be with them, but it felt so odd to be with them in Texas. I couldn't believe they were really here, but they were! Woohoo!

The next morning we went into the city of Dallas and did some sightseeing. We got to drive around the really wealthy neighborhoods of the city, saw SMU, and had an amazing lunch at the Oyster House, but the highlight of the day was when we went to the Sixth Floor Museum at the Texas Book Depository.

There was so much incredible history in that one building, and while it was pretty eerie to be standing in the room where Lee Harvey Oswalt allegedly shot JFK, it was so interesting! The exhibit was really crowded, but we still got to learn and see so much. As my mom said, you really leave with more questions than answers, and it's so incredible to me how little we still know about the events of that day 49 years later. We were there almost exactly on the anniversary, and the city is preparing for the 50th anniversary next year. We went and stood on the grassy knoll, saw where all the conspiracy theory guys sit and tell their stories, and the place between the trees from where people say they saw smoke coming after the assassination. He was so incredibly close to the end of the parade, which is even more heartbreaking!

I was completely fascinated by Jackie throughout all of the films and photos as well- she just kept going in spite of what had happened to her, getting off of Air Force One at Andrews Air Force Base with her blood-stained suit. She apparently got right to work on planning the funeral upon her return to DC, and remained strong in a time when most people would have fallen apart. I have always loved her sense of style and grace, and I can say now that I have even MORE respect and admiration for her after visiting Dallas.

That evening, we hung out in town square in Southlake, which was a lot of fun! It was finally seasonally appropriate weather in Texas- I was actually COLD! It was in the low 40s at night, and we walked around and shopped a bit before dinner. I have to admit that by that point I was suffering from a bit of culture shock- Southlake town square is beautiful, and full of high-end shops like Anthropologie and Lilly Pulitzer. I had a lot of fun shopping with my mom and Susan, but it was also a little weird- there were dresses that were 2 and a half times my stipend on the rack, and while I absolutely love those stores, it was a bit overwhelming.

There were SO many white people everywhere (myself included obviously, but as one of the other white teachers at school says, I sometimes have trouble remembering that I'm not Mexican), everything was clean and beautiful, and there was no sign of poverty anywhere. I realized that what was once my comfort zone had suddenly become uncomfortable to me, and smiled to myself as I remembered the JVC slogan: ruined for life.

Looking back on the past four months, I can absolutely say that I am ruined. I am so immersed in a place where I am face to face with poverty, injustice, and hunger each and every day. I can much more understand what it means to experience those things than I would have ever been able to before, and I'm comfortable in the uncomfort they cause- I am creating a change in the system, but in order to fight something, you have to know all about it. I now know poverty, and I'm ruined for life.

And I still have 8 months to go...

Thanks

So much has happened since I last posted that I feel the need to split it up into a few posts! So here's one on Thanksgiving, and look out for two more in the next few days about spending the weekend in Dallas and having family in Houston!



Thanksgiving in the JV house was completely different than any other Thanksgiving I've ever had, but it's definitely one I'll never forget.

At home, I am always woken up just before the Macy's parade begins, just in time to hear "Let's Have a Parade!" It's one of my favorite parts of Thanksgiving morning, as we watch the parade, have pancakes, and wait for Santa to arrive at Macy's. Usually while we are parade-watching, singing along to the musicals and getting filled in on celebrity happenings, we begin to decorate the house for Christmas! It's usually chilly outside, and around 2 or 3, we head over to Aunt Patsy's for a wonderful Thanksgiving meal.

This year, I woke up to my alarm at 9, and while I wanted to turn the parade on, there were people sleeping on the floor, strewn about the living room. The San Antonio JV house arrived on Wednesday night, and we had so much fun catching up with them and telling stories. I got up to start getting the kitchen ready for round 2- I had already cooked one turkey the night before, but there was still a lot to do before turkey #2 went in the oven! We had breakfast gathered around the TV and watched the parade while pies, cornbreads, and casseroles went in the oven.

The whole cooking process was a lot of work, but so much fun! Both turkeys turned out really well, as did the stuffing I made with my Nana's recipe! It was exhausting for sure, but we had a really lovely meal, and it was worth the work. We were able to enjoy spending time outside in our backyard- Thanksgiving under the palm trees, can you imagine?! It was a perfect day here in Texas, and while I was longing for home, I wouldn't want to have spent this Thanksgiving any other way.

I only felt it was appropriate to reflect a little bit about what I'm especially thankful for this year:

Music- I am pretty sure I wouldn't be able to get through this year without music. I am constantly listening to Pandora, iTunes, or Youtube. I can identify with many artists through the songs I'm listening to, and through singing, I am able to let myself go and relax.

Family- I miss my family so very much, but even 1500 miles away, they are so supportive of this crazy adventure I'm on. I can't wait to be reunited with everyone!

My wonderful boyfriend- I miss Tom so much, and he puts up with so much of my crazy, hectic teaching schedule! I know it's not easy to have any long-distance relationship, but between two busy, dedicated JVs, it's an extra challenge. I can't wait to see him again! It's less than a month :).

Cristo Rey Jesuit-  What an incredible community that I am so blessed to be a part of! This place challenges me in new ways every minute, but it has given me so much more than I could have asked for, and I'm only 4 months in. It will be very difficult to leave this place and these students.

My community- I absolutely couldn't do this without the five crazy, funny, outrageous and inspiring girls I live with. We're an odd bunch, but we work well together, and I know that we ended up in one house for a reason!

Friends- Friends at home and other places on the east coast (and abroad!), you mean the world to me. Thank you for the constant love, letters, texts, and cookies that come in the mail. I miss you all desperately, and I can't wait to see you over my Christmas vacation.

US Mail- Whether it's the jury duty notice that comes to my house that I need to fill out or the care package filled with fall treats or a Rita's Water Ice t-shirt, things that come in the Mail bring me so much joy. I also get so much joy from mailing letters and care packages! The US Mail rocks.

Let Us See God in All We Say and Do

Every afternoon at 4:00, when the final school bell rings, our campus minister comes on to say prayer. We always do some form of the examen, an Ignatian tradition. We are asked to think back over our day as if it was a movie, and notice our reaction to different events.

How did we feel when we woke up? What made us upset today? Where could we have done better? What was the best part of our day? Why?

While these are some heavy questions for 4:00 when really the only thing any of us want to do is get out of school, they have caused me to be much more reflective about my time here, which is definitely something I wanted to get out of this year. Mr. Martin ends each prayer with the phrase "let us see God in all we say and do."

This is something intrinsically Ignatian, the idea that we would want to see God in all we say and do. Part of Jesuit spirituality is finding God in everything, and in the past week or so, this idea has really sunk into my personal prayer life. I look to find God in every situation, whether it's a joyful moment filled with grace, or a frustrating or upsetting moment.

One of the Jesuit novices who has been spending time at CRJ told me something that has stuck with me over the past few days. An older Jesuit told it to him, and I think it's hilarious (and true): High school sophomores are Jesus Christ in His least recognizable form.

While I'm blessed enough to not teach any sophomores, I feel the same way sometimes about any given student. Difficult or frustrating interactions are a part of being a high school teacher, but it can be increasingly difficult to be simultaneously frustrated and find something sacred about a situation. Sometimes I am convinced that God is nowhere to be found in my 5th period class... but sometimes I am absolutely certain that I can feel His presence.

Remembering that God is in everything I say and do somehow is a relieving thought. When I'm anxious about something, I have been able to remember that God is with me, and I need to trust that He wouldn't lead me down a path I couldn't travel.

So as I prepare to spend my first Thanksgiving away from home, I'll remember that God is with me. I know He will be in our house filled with 18 JVs on Thursday, all sacrificing our family time to do His will. Happy almost-Thanksgiving, and let us see God in all we say and do.

This Girl is on Fire

 What a week! It was not only super productive, but I also did something I’ve never done before… I ran a 5K!

I have been working out the whole time I’ve been here, making the gym a priority when I can. I feel great, and I’m getting in much better shape! I really look forward to my gym time, if not only to catch up on my cable television. The greater Houston area YMCA is awesome, there are so many options for classes, and it’s just a really cool gym in general!

Megan, Karen, and I signed up for the 5K about a month ago, and we started trying to be very intentional about our training. I was really good about it for about two weeks, and then it slowly slipped away to the point that I hadn’t been to the gym in two weeks before last night. Oops. Life as a teacher just gets in the way!

We didn’t just run any 5K, it was a Color Run at night- this means that participants wear all white, and throughout the race, volunteers throw color powder on the runners, so your outfit is multicolored as you cross the finish line. We wore white t-shirts, and didn’t really have white bottoms to wear, so we made tutus to wear over our leggings. It was easy to keep track of each other with them, and they looked awesome by the end of the race!

We were so happy to be finished!

This was what we looked like before we left!

We had a very chill Friday and Saturday afternoon including lots of grading for Ms. Tully. I was very pleased to finish everything by Saturday morning, which meant that I could enjoy my Saturday evening and Sunday. I read a whole book over the course of the day, spent some time writing letters, and went to mass.

This week was productive for me in terms of schoolwork too, I’m lesson-planned through the Wednesday after Thanksgiving, and I’m hoping to be able to keep up the good pace and plan through the rest of the next week as well! It’s great to feel on top of my game. I finally found a balance for once, and I’m so happy about it!

I’m feeling in control of everything that I can be, and I’m super excited for what’s to come this week- including hosting Thanksgiving dinner for 18 people! We’re welcoming the other Houston house and the San Antonio community for Thanksgiving, and I’m so excited about it! I can’t wait to have everyone together to celebrate.

And if that’s not great enough, I get to see my family!!!!!!! Mom and Dad are flying to Dallas on Friday, where I will meet them and we’ll hang out with cousins Kevin, Susan, and Conor for the weekend. I’m so excited to see everyone, as well as to see a new part of Texas!

More exciting news: Ignatianlife.org read a submission that I sent them about some of my time here in Houston and liked it so much that they are going to publish it! It should be up soon, hopefully tonight or tomorrow. Go check it out- it’s the first of what I hope will be many opportunities for me to share my writing with bigger audiences.

We decided to road trip to Galveston on Thursday night... we went and sat on the beach for a while, looked at the stars, and made it home in time for bed at 10:30. We were so excited to see the beach!

Happy almost-Thanksgiving! Enjoy the music!

Baby, It's Cold Outside

So, while I'm slowly becoming more of a morning person, this morning was rough. In retrospect, it was great, but getting up this morning was very difficult.

Each morning, I start trying to get up at around 5:30. I usually lie in bed until 5:45, and in between I slowly poke one toe out from under the covers at a time, until eventually my whole leg is forced to face the cruel world outside my bed. This morning, as I was reluctantly beginning my whirlwind morning of getting to school by 6:40, and I stuck my toe out from the covers, I immediately rescinded it.

It. Was. FREEZING. Running through my head was the fact that not only did I not want to leave my warm cocoon, but wait.. I'm in Texas. Why am I cold? Wait... I'M COLD!!! IT'S FINALLY SEASONALLY APPROPRIATE WEATHER HERE! It only took until mid-November, but it was below 60! Yippee!

My delight was fleeting... the heat was not turned on in our house (it's Texas), so getting ready this morning was quite the Olympic sport. Once I pried myself from my bed, I ran (literally ran) into the kitchen with my handy dandy LLBean heating pad, threw it in the microwave, and turned the heat on. The thermostat was in "off" position, and read a chilly 58... oops. I grabbed my bathrobe, wrapped myself in it, and hopped from bathmat to bathmat to avoid the cold bathroom tile floor.

The combination of bathrobe and heating pad brought my body temperature back to normal, but I realized that the linen tunic and khakis that I had laid out for today probably wouldn't cut it... especially since this afternoon we have our first soccer game! My Catholic school instincts kicked in, and I went for tights, a skirt, and a sweater, combined with my standard Northface fleece.

I couldn't surrender the heating pad for my drive to school, it sat on my lap the whole drive. According to my iPhone, it was 45... hooray! I was worried that I was just a wimpy Texan and that my body had adjusted to the heat, but in fact, it's actually reasonable weather to feel cold in. Phew.

It then crossed my mind that as uncomfortable (and slightly gleeful) as I was to discover the change in the weather, I was able to fix it. I turned my heat on, and the house was warm by the time I left. Many of my students were met with the same shocking discovery of cold weather that I was this morning, but many of them weren't able to have the same quick fix that I had. They were cold this morning, and will continue to be throughout the season. While I'm living pretty simply, and in solidarity, I'm still exceptionally blessed and privileged.

So yes, I'm finally feeling fall weather- of course, on the day of our first soccer game! My Texan ladies will be a little chilly I believe, but I have confidence in the Lady Lions!

I Am Exactly Where I'm Meant to Be

I spent last night curled up in my PC sweatshirt drinking hot cocoa, and I knew in the moment that I was exactly where I was meant to be. And no, I did not give in to my temptation to retreat to the East Coast to watch the first snowfall of the year.

I was in the Cristo Rey Jesuit library for the school’s first “Student Union Night.” It’s a night where a section of the school is turned into a college-like student union, a place where the kids can hang out together, eat pizza, drink coffee, and work on their homework. What’s even better than most college student unions is that their teachers were there too to help them on the work they had assigned!

This night is a senior privilege, and most of the seniors came out. I was so happy to get the chance to hang out with the seniors and get to know them better, and while I don’t teach them, I was still able to help them work on papers that they had due. I also got to get closer to the girls on the soccer team that I’ve been assistant-coaching, which was really nice. They’re a lot of fun, and never fail to make me laugh!

Many of them have an 8-12 page paper due today, and many of them had between 3 and 5 pages written. In college, that would have been no problem- 2 or 3 hours of work more at the most. For these seniors, this is the longest paper they’ve had to write that wasn’t a final paper. Their teacher has very high expectations of them, and they were very overwhelmed. I was very happy to help calm their nerves, read what they had written so far, and give advice on how to continue.

Our spirituality night on Sunday was focused around a poem that Rachel shared with us that a friend of a friend had written. One of the lines really stuck out to me, and as I was curled in a chair drinking my hot cocoa discussing a paper with the seniors, I couldn’t help but remember it. 

“And the world steps in

to test the calm fluidity of your body

from moment to moment

as if it believed you could join its vibrant dance

of fire and calmness and final stillness

as if you were meant to be exactly where

you are.”

These past few weeks have been challenging. I am homesick, I am exhausted, and while I’ve had little breaks to catch up on my mental and physical health, I needed a reminder of why I was here. Tonight was that reminder for me.

So even though my hot cocoa was not accompanied by looking out at the newly fallen snow, I was at peace. I was looking at a room full of joyful, hilarious college-bound seniors whose lives I’m actually making a positive difference in. I am exactly where I am meant to be.

I Don't Go to Grad School

... but oh, am I learning.

This weekend, which was extremely relaxing and wonderful, I thought a lot about what I would have been doing if I wasn't a JV in Houston.

Honestly, I have no idea what that would be- I can't even picture it! I did think a lot about grad school, and it's still absolutely something that I want to pursue, but I want to have some real life experience first. I didn't want to spend my senior year of college or my JV year studying for the GREs and doing applications, and I'm really happy with that decision. While it's weird not being in school as a student, that changes nothing of the fact that I'm a lifelong learner, and I'm pretty sure that this is the best education I could have gotten this year.

What have I learned?

1. Teaching is really, really hard.
In fact, it might be the absolute hardest. This year is hands down the hardest thing I've ever done, and I'm doing it, but it's exhausting. I am simply flabbergasted by the hard work of all of my teachers and professors, and while it's also exceedingly rewarding, it's so challenging to remain energetic and enthusiastic! Teachers have twice the homework, by the way. No one told me that. My time management and organization skills have improved so much in the past three months out of pure necessity!

2. I'm an East Coast girl at heart.
See previous post. When it's almost Thanksgiving and you're wearing shorts and flipflops, there is something wrong with the universe.


3. There is so much that I don't know and there are so many books that I haven't read.
I am constantly adding to my "to read" list. I may have a college degree, but I don't know a lot. Many students expect their teachers to know everything. Yikes. I want to learn about so many things!! Good thing I'm only 22.. but I know better than to think that I've got time. This requires action!

4. It's so important to do things that scare you.
If I didn't do anything that scared me, I wouldn't be here right now. I have learned so much from so many seemingly scary experiences, and as one of my favorite members of the wizarding world of Harry Potter tells me, "Happiness can be found even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light." I should have remembered that while I was without power...

5. I can get up really early if I have to.
This has more to do with priorities than anything. You always have time for things if you MAKE time for things- what you do is what you prioritize. I DO have time to go to the gym if I MAKE time to go to the gym. Which I am consistently making time to do, even though I am so sleepy because I get up early. It will be worth it in the end!

So while I don't go to grad school, I am learning. And I'm only 3 months in... a quarter of my way through my JV year! How time flies! 17 days until I get to hang out with my parents in Texas, and 47 until I hit the East Coast!

There's No Place Like Home

As usual, I'm inspired by my students to write another blog post! John's Hyphenated Americans class got me again, and I've had a few days to ruminate on this one particular topic. It's something that I have written and thought about quite a bit throughout the last four years, and I was really interested in the way that the seniors were discussing it.

Home, and location, are things that I am constantly thinking about in relation to my identity. John posed this question to his seniors: Does location have anything to do with identity?

I have been struggling to answer this question for the past five years. While I had traveled a lot over the years with my family, college was the first time I was really living somewhere else. College is obviously a time of self-discovery, and as I was in my search for truth at PC, I suddenly realized that a large part of the truth about who I am has to do with where I'm from and where I am.

I have realized over the past few years that you can take the girl out of Philly, but you can't take the Philly out of the girl. I have not stopped being a die-hard Phils phan, checking the KYW website for news, or reading Philly.com. I always refer to the Philadelphia area as home, and while Providence definitely became my second home over time, I could never abandon my first love.

Philly is the first city I fell in love with. As a kid, I lived for the days I'd spend in Manhattan, and while I still love New York, it just isn't the same. Philly has something indescribable about it- it's the feeling you get walking down Broad Street on a chilly December day on your way to go see the lights show at (formerly) Strawbridge's, or on a sweltering summer day walking through Old City. I have always marveled at the diversity of Philadelphia, and the pride that Philadelphians have in our home.

Most people say "water" like it has two o's and a d in the middle of it. I love that. We eat water ice, and I'm not talking about a glass of water with ice in it or Italian Ice- water ice is different, and it's awesome. We can absolutely trash talk any other city without honestly knowing very much about it, and we're proud of that. As I have found myself living in different cities with people from all over the country, I have become increasingly proud of that- and not at all remorseful.

We go down the shore, and while we don't actually live there, we feel like we do. This past week, I found myself distracted so much by all of the devastation caused by Hurricane Sandy. So many people lost their homes, and I think we're all in a state of shock still... and everyone here kept on going like nothing happened. They're not connected to the East Coast.

I'm an East Coast girl for sure... living in Texas. It's a culture clash, which most often just leaves me laughing. I don't get Texas yet, and I'm ok with that. In time, maybe I will, but I know that the East Coast is always waiting for me. I miss East Coast cities, the pace at which we do things, and the appreciation for fall.

At school on Halloween, I wore a blue and white gingham dress and red high heels, and braided my hair, as a little homage to Dorothy. I realized how fitting that costume was for my general feeling- I know I'm doing good work, and I'm having fun, but there's no place like home.

So what does location have to do with identity? I think that when you're removed from your home, you get a better sense of how home is an integral part of your identity. I did, and continue to understand just how much I love all the Philadelphia/East Coast things about me. It makes you more fully aware of who you are. Location and identity are definitely linked. East Coast, I'll see you in seven weeks from today!

My dad gave me these ruby slippers to remind me that there's no place like home right before he left. I love them!

 

On Saturday night, we went out in the Montrose neighborhood of Houston. I scrapped my Mary Poppins idea in honor of Frauline Maria... I have confidence!

We carved pumpkins on Halloween night... I wanted to try to make it feel like fall!

The Hills Are Alive

On Saturday evening, I found myself in the middle of one of the most bizarre yet highly entertaining experiences I've ever had: a Sound of Music singalong at Hermann Park.

This has been on our community calendar for literally months at this point, it was probably the first thing we decided to do when we heard about all the things to do in the park. Rachel, Megan, Eva, and I grabbed some sandwiches to bring as a picnic, and off we went to claim our spot for premium singalong viewing pleasure.

Little did we know, we were not the only ones who had this idea. We figured that our arrival 30 minutes early would provide us with prime real estate on the lawn, but we were astonished to see that there were already at least 200 families already there! When we had been to other events in the park, there were not this many people, and both times we arrived late. We couldn't believe how many people had beaten us at our own game! Luckily, we still got a pretty good seat, and we set up our camp.

For those of you who don't know or don't remember, The Sound of Music, while a phenomenal movie,  is also about a million years long. 2 hours and 54 minutes, to be precise. We knew we had to be comfortable, and our sweatshirts, blankets and towels were exactly what we needed in order to set up a sufficient camp. We had plenty of extras to add padding as the evening went on, as sitting on the ground for that long can be somewhat uncomfortable.

Just as the movie was about to start, we were given little bags filled with everything we'd need- an invitation to the ball, cards to hold up during "How Do You Solve a Problem Like Maria?", our own sprig of "edelweiss," and a piece of cloth from the drapes behind Maria for playclothes. My most favorite treat in the goodie bag was a party popper, which we were instructed to pull at the exact moment when Maria and Captain Von Trapp FINALLY kiss. We had a great host named Erin, who told us to hiss when we saw the Baronness, boo at Nazis, cheer every time Julie Andrews walked in a room, and bark when we saw Rolf, because he's such a dog. There were hand motions for "Do a Deer," and we all swayed back and forth singing "Edelweiss."

I remembered how much I loved this classic movie, but especially in the beginning, I drew a lot of parallels between Maria and myself and my experiences here (if I have to be compared to Julie Andrews, I'll take it), especially towards the beginning of the movie. When Maria leaves the Abbey, she's looking for something more, and while she ultimately had a lot of hesitations about leaving, she knew that this new adventure was God's will for her. If that doesn't describe my entire packing/driving to Texas process, I don't know what does. I was devastated to leave home, friends and family, and while my days in the hills had to come to an end, I know that I'm on an important journey, and it's a step that will help me to discern what's next for my life.

When she finally gets off the train in Salzburg, Maria is skipping down the streets with her guitar case, singing what might be my favorite song in the entire movie, "I Have Confidence." She has confidence in herself to do the work she's been asked to do, taking care of these children who need a positive role model in their lives. She may not have any experience, but she knows that she'll figure it out, because she has a good attitude. The whole scene is joyful and freeing, but when she arrives at the gate of the Von Trapp estate, Maria is suddenly a bit overwhelmed. I love when she holds on to the gate and just takes it all in, but I love her reaction more: "Oh, help." The whole way here and the days leading up to my first day of school, I was feeling slightly overwhelmed yet confident in my ability to do this work. I pulled up to Cristo Rey that first morning, and I said a similar prayer as I got out of my car and walked into school as a teacher for the first time.

Maria confesses to the Von Trapp children that she doesn't know a lot about being a governess, and is overwhelmed by the rigidity of the children's lives and their uniforms... sounds familiar. She does things her own way, and while it is different from what the children might be used to, it works. Maria forms strong relationships with the children, and earns their respect and love over time by sharing her love of music and performance with them.

So, am I as flawlessly perfect as Julie Andrews throughout this whole experience? Absolutely not. I have gone through a lot of the same experiences, but probably a lot less gracefully, and with more tears and exhaustion than Julie ever lets on, but we can't all be practically perfect in every way!

Speaking of... Halloween is coming up, and I'm pretty sure I'll be going as Mary Poppins. That's a different story for a different day, but I'm pretty excited :). My days living up to the Julie Andrews standard continue, as it's the end of the quarter and I'm scrambling to get my grades in! It's a challenge, but sometimes I sit back and think about the fact that I'm here, as a JV, working for justice every single day. It's a dream come true, and as hard as it is some days, I don't think I'd trade it for anything else. As the Mother Superior tells Maria, "Climb every mountain... A dream that will need all the love you can give, every day of your life, for as long as you live." I'm climbing the mountain, and while it's steep at the moment, it's also beautiful and fulfilling. I can hear the sound of music, and I'm singing along.

Wandering

I have been immersed in the book From the Pews in the Back: Young Women and Catholicism, edited by Kate Dugan and Jennifer Owens for the past two days. I'm about 2/3 of the way through, and I will most likely finish it this evening. It's a book that I actually borrowed from my community member Megan, who borrowed it from a JV in the other Houston casa, Emily. It's a collection of different short personal stories about the female experience with Catholicism, both positive and negative, serious and funny.

I like it because some of the women raise the same questions about their faith that I have, and while they may not have the answers, it's at least a different point of view and perspective on the issue. I have been trying to really work on spirituality the most of the four pillars of JVC, because since leaving my faith community bubble at PC, I have felt really distant from God.

The distance actually started when I went to Ireland as a junior... I had just returned to PC from an amazing immerison experience in Kenya, been super active in PC Campus Ministry, and was feeling very much at peace with my faith and very spiritually connected. When I went to Ireland, I found myself in a surprisingly secular culture. I church-shopped, and while I found a church to go to for weekly mass, it wasn't a place I could really feel at home in. Six long months went by, and I was so excited to come back to Providence for the summer to really reconnect with the Friars and my faith.

Enter: one of the best summers of my life so far. I lived in a great house with Kathleen, and she, Kelly, and I shared amazing dinners, adventures, and conversations. We got closer with the Friars, especially Fr. Cuddy, and talked about and lived our faith through kind words and actions, and through pure joy. We had a tradition each night at dinner where we shared the "grace of our day." It was sometimes a person and sometimes an instance where we saw God in the day, but the grace of my day was most often our dinner conversation. I was propelled into senior year with a strong sense of faith again, and while the looming g-word (graduation) left me with slightly less peace than I had when I came back from Kenya, I felt connected to God.

Graduation was of course heart-wrenching (have you noticed I miss PC?), and I fell out of the habit of going to mass when I was home over the summer. I read a lot about faith, and was very excited to have this year to try to reconnect and get back into a good place with my relationship with God.

I'm definitely having to work harder than I was hoping, but that's not a bad thing. And I'm not just talking about at work, I mean with my faith. I go weekly mass, and I love our Sunday morning routine, but I miss my OPs and the community at PC. I just submitted an application for Spiritual Direction at a retreat center in Houston where the specialty is faith formation, and the best part is that it's free for JVs! In the mean time, I'll be praying, reading, and researching new ways to connect to God. The cool thing is that I am working for social justice every day while I'm here, and that is something I can very easily connect to.

This is a year of growth for sure, and I look at it as an opportunity to explore my faith. Not all those who wander are lost, and I don't feel lost- just wandering, looking for a place to get comfortable. I also know that my journey of faith is a lifelong one, and that this is just a stop.

Any book suggestions for me? I'd gladly take them :). And I promise If I read any other good ones, I'll pass them along to you!

Letting Go

What a jam-packed weekend this was! It might have been our busiest so far, and while I definitely should have gotten more schoolwork done, I was happy to be doing the things I did with my community.

Friday night was the big homecoming dance, and myself and four of my five roommates were chaperones. We had so much fun at the dance- I keep saying that I think I actually may have had more fun than the students! We got all dressed up to go, and we were so amazed by everything we saw once we got there. The theme was Alice in Wonderland, and the students did an incredible job decorating the gym! It looked really fantastical, especially for it being in a gym... there was a photobooth with Alice props, projectors with different scenes from the movie on the wall, and a fog machine with a lighted entryway when you walked in the door. The music was great, and the kids looked awesome. It was so funny to see my freshmen in their semi-formal attire, they looked great all dressed up! The juniors looked so very mature, and they are all really incredible dancers.

We couldn't leave the house without taking any awkward homecoming photos in front of the fireplace...

Saturday was a very eventful day too! After sleeping in from the exhaustion of our night at homecoming, we split up and did different fun things around the city. Rachel went to a community planting day at the house of another group of volunteers in the neighborhood, Eva and Cassie checked out the museum district, and Megan, Karen and I went to the Y where there is an outdoor pool! We basked in the sun for a while, because while you on the East coast were wearing your jackets and scarves, it was almost 90 degrees here in Houston. I worked out, and then got some solid grading done poolside. We had an evening of Boy Meets World and mac and cheese, and then went on an adventure to Market Square Park!

There was an outdoor concert with two really great bands, a parade of some of Houston's famous "art cars," and really great greek food and local beer. We had a lot of fun enjoying the park, and it was the first time that we actually got a sense of culture in Houston. It was a lovely evening to be out and about, and we went to two very cool bars near by after the concerts. All in all a fun, but very tiring night.

This is me and my direct roommate, Karen!

Today was a very typical Sunday, including mass, cleaning, and grocery shopping. The homily at mass was all about letting go, and how hard that can be. It especially hit home for me considering the fact that Tom and a lot of our friends are in Providence this weekend, and I really miss PC and my Friar friends. I am so happy at work here, and my community is filled with a lot of love, but I don't really love Houston as a city.  I know that there must be more it can give me, but right now, it's not giving me much to love. A woman at Market Square Park last night was wearing a t-shirt that said "It's OK to love Houston," and I wanted to tell her that yes, I wanted to love Houston, but I don't know how! It's hard to let go of home and Providence, and as I've said before: this year and my work are amazing, but I'm an East Coast girl at heart.

So I'm trying to let go of all the sad feelings I have toward not being in Providence or Philadelphia, and focus on trying to love Houston. I want to love it, I do, but I haven't figured out how to just quite yet.

College-Bound

Last night was a slightly surreal experience for me, but it was a lot of fun at the same time! At 5:30, I got on a bus with 65 college-bound CRJ students, and we drove across the city of Houston from quaint little CRJ to big prestigious Strake Jesuit.

Strake, as I think I've mentioned before, is the St. Joe's Prep, Chaminade, or Hendricken of Houston: an elite all-boys Prep school in Houston. It shares a campus with St. Agnes Academy, the Dominican Sisters all-girls school where Sister Mary works. Strake hosted a college fair last night, open to students of Catholic schools in the Houston-Galveston Diocese.

There were a HUGE number of schools represented- over 200! Our students were a little overwhelmed at first- a lot of people, a gorgeous campus of a high school, and colleges all over the country. They knew they couldn't talk to every college, and had a few ideas of which schools they wanted to talk to, but we were there for a long time. Many students kept coming up to me to ask for more recommendations about where to look: "I want a small school, not in Texas, and I want to study Psychology." "I want a huge school, outside of Texas, and I want to be a lawyer." etc...

I sent my fair share over to check out PC of course, but many of my students had already met with Fr. Iri during his visit to Cristo Rey earlier in the day. It was fun to try to match students up with different colleges they might like, and even more fun to see them come back with excited smiles on their faces. For many of them, last night was probably the first time the conversation about them going to college actually became a reality, and I so enjoyed watching that happen.

My job was mostly to walk around the fair and be there for students who looked a little lost. They were easy to pick out in their CRJ uniforms :). I got to do a lot of people watching in the mean time- I noticed which college representatives were engaging and excited, as well as those who were not. As I mentioned before, this fair was for any Catholic school student in the area, and so while my main focus was on my own students, I couldn't help but notice their competition.

The other students were a lot like me- the girls, while wearing a St. Agnes uniform, looked like they could have gone to Notre Dame. They had noses turned up at schools like Sam Houston State and University of Houston, but were eagerly in line for Notre Dame, Georgetown, St. Louis University, Penn, Elon, Emory.... you name a tier one or two school, and its table was swarming with girls from St. Agnes, Incarnate Word Academy, or boys from Strake. My students were a little overwhelmed by them at first, especially when they were trying to talk to the same schools, but I saw them all gain confidence over the course of the evening.

One of many advantages that the other students had over mine was the fact that usually, they were not alone. They had helicopter parents engaging the representatives in conversations, pushing them toward certain tables, and knowing lots of good questions to ask. Most of our students' parents were not in attendance, so the other teachers and I took on the helicopter parent role when we could. We spoke with reps, stood in line with our students,  and pushed them towards tables of schools that they might not think they can get into, even though we know we can.

So why was last night surreal? It was the first time other than Kairos that I was able to see my students experience something that I also went through in high school, and how differently they had to experience it. I was so extremely proud of them, and had a lot of fun in the process, but it was definitely another step toward solidarity with my students: I'm beginning to understand how differently their lives are than mine.

Mission: Community

Happy Tuesday!

In college, Tuesday was the best day of the week. I'm hoping that it lives up to its reputation today, as it's the first day of my week!

I spent yesterday on a JVC Day of Reflection with my community and Katie, our JVC Program Coordinator. We were at the Cenacle Retreat House, where I spent my day with Sister Mary a few weeks ago.

We talked about the four values of JVC, spirituality, simplicity, social justice, and community, and how each of them is playing out in our lives as JVs and in our community as a whole. We did an activity about which value we most identify with in certain situations, and which one our house engages with the most. It was interesting to see where we each stood on different values (literally, we moved to the four corners of the room depending on the value we were discussing), and how much we knew about each other and which answers weren't surprising to us.

We then created a mission statement for our community- and honestly, it's pretty beautiful. I love it a lot. We all contributed our ideas about community, and chose to model it after Karen's sorority's creed: we make promises to the world, to one another, and to ourselves.

Casa Rulitio Grande 2012-13

We are stewards to the world. We promise to use our gifts and talents to promote social justice. We are committed to seeking the truth, being a voice for the voiceless, and fostering a welcoming atmosphere for all.

We lift each other up. We promise to build a house with love, respect, and understanding. We will encourage each other to be open to challenges and sacrifice.

I am on a lifelong journey. I promise to have an honest, open heart, and a willingness to grow. I will be gentle with myself, and I will be open to vulnerability and new perspective. 

We are servants to ourselves, one another, and the world.

We're so poetic, aren't we? I love the mission statement, and we're planning to create a piece of art with the words and hang it above our couch in our living room.

The day of reflection was a nice break from the daily errands and business that we end up having to do, even on our days off. It was lovely to be able to hang out outside in the beautiful 75-degree weather, and in the morning when it was still "cold," we enjoyed some hot chocolate on our porch. 

Speaking of the "cold" in Houston, the universe finally listened to me and sent some cool weather our way! Sunday evening, we went to Hermann Park to a celebration of Gandhi's birthday, and sat at the outdoor theatre to watch a dance drama of an Indian tale called Manav Kanya. It was a nice night to be outside if a bit chilly, in the low 60s/high 50s. A sweatshirt and yoga pants kept me nice and toasty, but when I looked across the lawn and saw a woman wearing a giant puffy coat, I had to laugh. I checked my handy dandy iPhone- 63 degrees. Her coat was like the one I bought for New England winters from LL Bean.... Oh, Texas.

We're back in the 80's today... and I'm taking my students to a college fair at Strake Jesuit College Prep tonight (think St. Joe's Prep of Houston). I'm excited to see them interact with different college representatives, and especially to see Fr. Iri Andujar, OP, who will be visiting from Providence College! He's stopping by Cristo Rey Jesuit today, and I'm really excited to see him. I'm all decked out in my black and white today, a little taste of Providence on this terrific Tuesday!

The bigger your hair, the closer you are to God.

While watching Friday Night Lights on Monday evening with Karen, that line stood out to me: "The bigger your hair, the closer you are to God." This is so Texas in every sense of the word. If you're a woman in Texas, your hair is big. It could be big because you put hours of effort and pounds of hairspray into it to make it that way, or it could be big just because you're in Texas and it's 195% humidity.

So yes, my hair is big today. It's in a ponytail... a big ponytail. I guess that means I'm pretty close to God, which is a nice thought on this Friday afternoon.

This was a LONG week. Monday seems like it was so far away, and I am so looking forward to a relaxing weekend. I was out to dinner Tuesday (at Chris and Ryan's again, where I had an amazingly delicious dinner again...), and last night we had a JVC fundraiser at Block 7 Wine Bar, which was a lot of fun, but waking up this morning was not.

We got to meet a lot of FJVs who live in Houston last night, and it was really fun to talk to people who used to live in our houses and know exactly how we feel and what we're going through. It was also so lovely to have a huge representation from CRJ at the event- our principal, some board members, as well as other CRJ supporters were there, and when I introduced myself to the whole room, they were clapping and smiling to cheer me on. Yet another reminder of how amazing this community is :).

Wednesday was a tough day- my drama kids failed a test (for the most part), so I was disappointed in them and simultaneously questioning my own teaching abilities, I had to emergency sub two classes, and I wasn't feeling 100%. Soccer practice was fun (there will be a whole post about soccer later...), but when I got home, I received a text message with news no one ever wants to receive. A good friend of mine from high school lost her mom on Wednesday, and while I had been griping about having such a bad day, my whole world got put into perspective.

Sure I had a frustrating day at school, but the people who mean the most to me in the world are all happy and healthy. Though it's challenging, I'm doing good work every day, and I had a wonderful, supportive community to go home to. A glass of wine and a movie with my roommates followed up by phone conversations with my parents and Tom made me feel a lot better, but I'm definitely so ready for this weekend!

I'm cat/apartment-sitting for Chris and Ryan while they're at a wedding, which means that tonight I'll be on my own, eating food that they have left for me, and enjoying some amenities that I don't get in my every day life as a JV (a new kitchen and cable TV!). It will a nice mini-vacation for me, and the perfect way to relax after a long week.

Live the Fourth

Spoiler alert: if you're planning to go on the Kairos retreat ever, don't read this blog post!!


Now that that's settled, let's talk about last night.

The last part of Kairos is the "homecoming," where family and friends of retreatants are at school, gathered together, waiting for them upon their return home. The retreatants have no idea that their families will be waiting for them, and it's a time to share what happened on the retreat and how the retreatants have grown and changed.

Homecoming was last night, and it was one of the most beautiful experiences of my entire life. I didn't even go on the retreat, but I was so amazed by and proud of the eloquence of these students. Students each have the opportunity (it's an open mic) to share a little bit about what they learned, and are able to publicly address their families if they so choose. So many students were so moved to tell their parents how much they love them, even though they don't show it. Most speeches were tear-filled, and I could tell that in many cases, there were no words to express the love these students were feeling.

Many students felt the need to apologize to their parents for not being the daughters/sons they know they can be, and for not showing the love that they feel. They touched upon showing their love and faith through actions, not through words alone.

Many other students took the opportunity to thank their parents for the sacrifices they've made. In the words of one of my students, "Mom, as a single mom, you put up with so much, and sacrifice so much for me. Excuse my French, but we've been through a lot of shit, and everything you do, you do for me. I love you so much." At this point, the mascara was running down my face, and I was so proud of my student for her strength and for showing the love she feels.

One student who took the opportunity to apologize to his dad had another surprise- as soon as the students were finished speaking, his dad got up to speak. The student had apologized for not being a good son, but his dad took the time to point out that his son's mistakes had been made out of innocence, that he didn't know any better. He's growing up, and he's expected to make mistakes. The dad told the whole room that instead of his son apologizing to him, he felt the need to apologize to his son. He hadn't been the dad that he could be, or that his son needed, and his mistakes were made out of ignorance.

cue: no more mascara on my eyelashes, all of it on my cheeks.

Having gone through Kairos in high school was such a powerful experience. I distinctly remember my own homecoming, and the homecomings after mine that I went to. The speeches are always so touching, but seeing kids who have all kinds of drama in their lives- far more than most of the girls I went to high school with- bare all and show such love and gratitude, was so overwhelmingly beautiful.

This was one of those times when I realized that regardless of how I physically came to be in that gym, it was the right place to be. There is a reason why I am in Texas, and it's to be with and learn from these kids.

On the way out, I heard girls calling my name- my juniors who went on the retreat. They all gave me hugs and thanked me for what I shared with them on the retreat (Kairos secrets, sorry). They then proceeded to tell me that we need to catch up this week- they feel like I'm the only one they can really talk to about anything, and they have a lot to process.

cue: Why did I even wear makeup?!

These students are amazing, and I am so blessed to be a part of this community! I can't wait to catch up with everyone who went on the retreat, both the students and teachers. They challenged me to think about what I learned on Kairos, and to live the fourth (Kairos secrets, sorry!) every day. It's a challenge we're taking on together, and I know we can do it.

You've Got to Have Friends

Happy Kairos!

For those of you who are unfamiliar, Kairos is a four-day retreat that many high school juniors and seniors, as well as at certain colleges. Kairos is a Greek word meaning "God's time." It's based on a Jesuit tradition, and the seniors and eight juniors here at Cristo Rey Jesuit are on their way to the first EVER Kairos here!

I went on Kairos when I was in high school, and it was honestly one of the most influential experiences I've ever had. I'm pretty confident that I wouldn't be here as a JV had I not gone on Kairos! I went as a junior and lead the retreat in the fall of my senior year. I learned a lot about myself and my relationship with God in those four days, and while I'd love to tell you ALL about it, I don't want to give it all away! Pretty much everything that happens on Kairos is a huge secret, so I don't want to post anything on here that could be found by a future retreatant. Let's just say that A LOT of work goes into preparing for Kairos, and I have been supporting our Campus Minister to get the retreat off the ground.

I was supposed to be attending the retreat, but things got mixed up with different substitute needs, so I'll be here instead. I was pretty disappointed when I first found out that I wouldn't be going on retreat, but I absolutely understand the reasoning behind it. I don't teach seniors (though I will in the Spring), and I honestly don't know many of them yet. I do teach six of the eight juniors going on the retreat, but I have too many other responsibilities to go on Kairos unfortunately.

I ask for your prayers and good thoughts for my students on the retreat! They'll return to school on Saturday afternoon, and I'll be here to greet them :). I have been very nostalgic about my own Kairos experience, and I have one of the journals from one of my retreats with me here in Houston. I am anxious to be able to talk with my students when they get home.

I'm missing home today, especially as I come to realize that I'm not going home any time soon. It's September 26th, which means I'll be home in just under three months, and I'll see my parents in just under two. It's a long time to be away. Thanks for all the support, though! I have gotten cards, drawings, Alex and Ani bracelets, and letters- I wouldn't be able to do this without the support of my wonderful friends and family.

This is something I came to realize six years ago on Kairos XXXIV (I can't believe that was six years ago...), and I guess I needed another Kairos to remember it! I would be nowhere without you all. So while my students are on God's time, and I'm still on school time, I'm trying to remember the lessons I learned, and have my heart be on God's time. Tonight is about doubt, but then tomorrow is about love. Friday is about trust, and Saturday is about living.

This one goes out to XXXIV and Mrs. Sajeski especially :).

Also: I got asked to Homecoming by a freshman today... story to follow.

Love is in The Air...

... everywhere I look around!

It's Homecoming season here at Cristo Rey Jesuit, and you can tell! Not only does the school have posters and flyers on every wall, but the creative ways to ask each other to come to the dance have begun. On Thursday, one of my students asked me what to do if someone she didn't want to go with asked her, and how to let him down gently.

This morning, she came walking toward me with a bouquet of flowers in one hand and a small cake shaped like a rose in the other. The cake said "Homecoming?" on it... two more boys asked her this morning. The look on her face said it all: she did not want to go with either boy. It was pretty funny, but I tried to hide my laughter as I counseled her on how to let them down easy.

Today and the rest of the week are actually pretty easy for me! Between standardized testing, work schedules, and interviewing teachers who will teach a sample lesson to my class, I only teach three classes each day except for Thursday. I'm trying to take advantage of all this extra time to plan and prepare, but it's tempting to just hang out with the other teachers!

Quick update today, but more to come later this week!

Faith and Freedom

Happy Saturday!!

This weekend is Faith and Freedom weekend for Human Trafficking Awareness Month, so our house has been going to a lot of different interfaith activities since Thursday evening. We have not only been able to learn about more spiritual traditions, but look at social justice through the lens of another faith, and it's been a refreshing experience so far.

Thursday evening we went to a Seder in honor of the anti-human trafficking movement. While Seders are usually held during Passover in the Spring, this one included many traditional elements as well as special quotes and readings related to modern-day slavery. We learned about the traditional foods of the Seder, and while ours was a "reader's digest version," it was still very moving. We also enjoyed a dinner of traditionally Jewish foods, and as JVs got to bring home the leftovers- I just had a lovely cup of motzah ball soup for lunch!

Friday, we didn't have a specific faith and freedom event, but the theme still fit the evening- freedom! It was so great to be able to relax, hang out, and watch a movie (Dirty Dancing- Anne Jordan, I think of you every time). We went to the refresqueria across the street from our house, which is kind of like a corner store and restaurant combined. Rachel had some really good nachos and I got a licuado, which is somewhere in between a smoothie and a milkshake. Mine was strawberry, so delicious! The family who runs the refresqueria is so sweet, and while I couldn't actually communicate with them, it was so great to find somewhere so close to our house to get a good, cheap snack. I passed out on the couch not long after 10 PM... I was a little tired.

This morning, we got up and drove to the Memorial part of the city, where we went to "Flow for Freedom," a yoga practice and meditation focused on anti-human trafficking efforts. It was a little bit humid for outdoor yoga, even at 9, but it was a great way to start the day, and the bagels after were delicious, as well as the fair-trade tea! After yoga and breakfast, we continued our very stereotypically "kashi granola-crunch" day and went to the new Trader Joe's in Houston! It opened yesterday, and we were so very excited to see what they had to offer.

I'm still not over the ability to buy alcohol somewhere other than a state store, and I was finally able to partake in the infamous "2-buck Chuck," the Charles Shaw wine for $2 (it's actually $2.99) per bottle. We got a few little treats for the house, and have had such a lovely, relaxing afternoon. This is one of the first Saturdays that we've been able to enjoy the whole day to ourselves with electricity and air conditioning, and I have really enjoyed the freedom to do things like catch up on TV that I missed this week and just curl up in my bed with my book.

We're heading to the gym for a quick workout before we get our plans together for the night, and I have some pretty serious grading and planning to do before Monday morning hits, but I'm hoping that we can still find some time to blow off some steam tonight and go out for an hour or two- though I do want to catch Mumford and Sons on SNL tonight!

Tomorrow will be the usual Sunday errands, Mass, and a quick Torchy's tacos trip thrown in. I do like our Sunday routine a lot, but it's been so nice to have Saturday to relax and do what we want to do!

Back to Reality

Hello, everyone!

Sorry about the lack of posts this week... grades are due, and I'm trying to figure out how to use Power School. I'm back in the world of technology, after a long process of waiting for the UPS truck to come! I got a replacement phone on Tuesday, and though I lost a few photos and phone numbers in the process, I'm all set.

Have you ever had one of those moments where you stop and think about how you physically ended up in the place that you are? This was definitely me on Monday. I got to leave school early (my eighth period students were working), and I went right to the gym. It was great because I got a parking spot, and I was super stressed. I saw that there was a Tai Chi class at 5:45, which I thought sounded PERFECT for me, I needed to RELAX! I was a little early, though, and Janelle, our JVC Program Director was coming over at 6:15 to deliver some cupcakes. Hmm, there's a class at 4:45... BodyPump? It says it's for all levels.... ok, I'll give it a shot.

For those of you who are unaware, like me, BodyPump is a class that involves barbells. You can change the weights (trust me, I did), and it's self-driven but lead by an instructor. To say it nicely, the class totally kicked my butt. At one point while I was lying on a bench doing tricep extensions, I thought, "how did I end up in this situation?"

While I was definitely thinking about the physical pain I knew I would be in within a few hours, I was also thinking about the fact that I was in Texas. What?

Monday was the first time it really started to sink in that I'm in Texas. The Houston downtown Y is gorgeous, and there are really incredible views of the downtown area from the group exercise rooms as well as the workout rooms. I could see that infamous big sky, the big buildings of downtown, and I giggled as I heard the Texan accent of my BodyPump instructor. My students pretty much think that the East Coast is a different country, and a lot of the time I think they're right, and that Texas is actually its own country.

There are lots of times when I think that there is no way I could actually live here- it's been an interesting place to visit for sure, but I'm fairly positive that I will not be in Texas one year from today. I'm an East Coast girl at heart, and I miss Philadelphia, friends, and family too much to stay this far away. Sometimes I have an amazing interaction with my students and I think "how could I leave them?!" but Mom and Dad, don't worry... Fall, hot chocolate, winter, and people who move more than 5 miles an hour are calling me back home.

I am used to the heat and ridiculous humidity, but I will admit that I was thrilled this morning to get in my car when it was 66 degrees! It was actually a little bit chilly... and lovely. I'm still going Fall-crazy, and I have big plans to make many pumpkin-flavored things this weekend. Trader Joe's opens on Saturday... I'll be there!

xo

PS- Happy 80th Birthday to my amazing grandma! I love you and can't wait to see you!

Rough Weekend

What a weekend! It was very eventful, but also a little bit stressful. I went home on Friday and ultimately decided not to go to the CRJ football game. It was thundering and lighting, pouring rain, and I didn't want to hit traffic getting back to school. We came to the conclusion that we wouldn't be going to the game, but then Megan and I realized....

That we could go to the Phillies!! We were there for the 12-6 win on Friday night, and we had seats in the way high up nosebleeds of right field, but we didn't care. We got to the ballpark early, met Kevin Frandsen (3rd base for the Phils!), got his autograph, and had so much fun with our various signs that we made. It was a great game for Phils phans and was definitely the highlight of the weekend.

The next night we had really amazing seats thanks to my Aunt Patti and Uncle PJ, which I got for my graduation. We were right behind home plate- so cool! We went early again, but didn't meet any players this time. It was still cool to be so close to the players and to Charlie Manuel, the Phils manager, and we know that Carlos Ruiz (Chooooooooch!) saw our sign for him! Charlie waved to us too... but that was the end of the good night. The Phils were embarrassingly shut out by the Astros, and the fans around us were not as nice as those who sit in the 400 level.

As we were leaving the park and got to my car after a really disappointing night, I realized that I didn't have my cell phone with me. We went back to the stadium to try to look or have someone look for us, but no one was very helpful, and after a long string of events and "Find My iPhone," we determined that my phone was stolen. It was a disappointing day to say the least, and I'm pretty upset still, but thankfully I had insurance on the phone and my new phone is on the way, it should be delivered to school tomorrow!

The game today was equally upsetting- 7-6 loss, and the boys did not play to their best ability. They're not playing like they deserve the wildcard... very upsetting. Compile that with the fact that today was my last interaction with Phillies baseball until August 2013, and you have a very unhappy phan. The Astros are switching leagues next year, and they won't be playing the Phils at all.

I was also so upset that I couldn't be home today for my Nana's surprise 80th birthday party! She's so important to me, and even though my cousin Jenn and I did try to do some plotting to get me home this weekend, it just wasn't plausible. I miss my whole family, and I would have loved to have been with them to join in this celebration. I missed my Dad's 60th birthday last week, but I want to thank all of you who helped me with his gift! I collected 60 letters from family and friends filled with memories and birthday wishes, and with the help of US Mail and Aunt Phyllis, they got to my mom in time to give to my Dad on his birthday.

This weekend I missed the East Coast a lot. Eva's boyfriend came to visit, and I was so happy to meet him, but it also made me miss Tom a lot too. I miss my family, going to see the Phils at home, and fall weather! It hit 75 tonight... sweater weather in Texas! PC is back in full swing, and I got my yearbook on Saturday. I'm feeling nostalgic and a little homesick, but I know that I'm in Texas for a reason, and I'm trying to focus on my work. My parents will be here to visit around Thanksgiving (67 days!), I LOVE Halloween, and Megan and I had a really great night on Friday. I'm looking for this week to turn around in a drastic way, and I have faith that it will.

As I've heard before, the best way to cure anything is a good laugh and a long sleep. Luckily, I've inherited the Tully family ability to sleep, and I'm looking for a good laugh from my community members. I'm doing ok, and I'll be back to being ecstatic soon :).

TGIF

On my drive in this morning, XM Broadway radio played "One Day More," one of the most famous songs from Les Miserables, and I think it was absolutely fitting to the way I feel right now. I have had another great week at CRJ, but I'm actually exhausted, and I couldn't be happier that today is Friday!

Last night was back to school night/open house here, and it was a great night for a lot of reasons. I was pretty nervous to meet the parents, but I was also really happy to be able to welcome them into my classroom and tell them about my classes. This back to school night was different than any other that I had ever experienced, aside from the fact that it's the first one I actually attended- my students came too.  For the most part, the students accompany their parents to each classroom, whether it is to translate for them or just to show them around. I never went to a back to school night until last night, so I certainly never went as a student. The parents were really wonderful and supportive, and I had so much fun meeting them!

I really loved seeing the pride that my students had in taking their parents around the school. They were excited to introduce me to their families, and my mere 6 minutes with each class was enough for me to see the similarities between students and their parents, both in looks and mannerisms. Meeting some parents explained so much about their students, and I had a good laugh on my drive home.

The parents were all so generous, and the most common question was "what do you need help with that parents can do?" This especially came from the parents of my drama students- they're superstars. I am so lucky to have such an incredible first year of teaching experience!

Tonight is the first Cristo Rey Jesuit home football game! The Lions are 1-1, with a win in their first game EVER and a tough loss this past Tuesday. We're hoping for a W tonight for them as "the pride" takes the field for the first time at CRJ! I'll be there cheering on my students- I teach the quarterback! I am so excited for them, and we'll be having a pep rally this afternoon. When the students walked in the door, they encountered St. Ignatius showing his CRJ pride as well.

Go Lions!

This weekend will also include a trip or two to the "juicebox"- Minute Maid Park. The Phillies are here! And I am mortified of course that they lost to the "Lastros" as Houstonians call them, but I'm pretty ecstatic about seeing the boys in action as they chase the wildcard. Look for me on TV on Saturday and Sunday... I have great tickets and even better signs :). Megan and I have been counting down the days til the game, and watching the DVD of the 2008 World Series in bits and pieces each night. Our roommates think we're crazy, but we just know it's because they're not lucky enough to be phans :).

So Go Lions, Go Phils, and Happy Friday! Here's to a phantastic weekend filled with lots of wins and lots of sleep!

Always Love

So life in Texas is obviously a little bit different than life in Providence or Philly or Ireland or Kenya... this is not something that should come as a great surprise to anyone, and it certainly doesn't for me. I have lived in enough different cities and countries in the past four years to know that I would certainly have to adjust.

And what an adjustment it has been... it is really hot here, did you know that? But you have to bring a sweater with you everywhere, because it's so highly air conditioned everywhere you go. And there are an odd number of stray dogs here, and as many of you may know, I don't mix so well with most animals, especially most dogs, so that isn't my most favorite thing. "Y'all" is a constant reminder that I'm not in Kansas anymore, and I am still holding out on adapting it... I survived four years in Providence and I only managed to pick up the very occasional "wicked," so I think I'll be ok in Texas for a year.

Sunday night, we immersed ourselves into one aspect of Houstonian culture that is right outside our door, and that we work with every day, but we never really get to the culture of: the immigrant community here. I teach students who are immigrants themselves and children of immigrants, I struggle to teach proper English grammar to students whose second language is my first, and I drive past Spanish signs and hear Spanish every day. Some of these immigrants are Mexican, many are not. I live with two children of immigrant parents, and while I know this and am aware of it each day, my actions in school are the limit of my involvement with this aspect of the culture.

But then, there's food. One of the reasons I love food is that it's so universal- everyone has a favorite dish, and our culture as a whole is so fascinated by food, and whether it's viewed in a positive or negative light depends on where it's coming from. Eva took us to a restaurant on Sunday where I got to participate in the immigrant culture and really be immersed in it, and by doing so, I got to eat some delicious food.

Papusas. Pupusas. Popusas. Ever had them? They're spelled in different ways depending on who you ask, but while I don't really know how to spell them, I know I really like to eat them. They're a treat from El Salvador that Eva has talked about since day one of JVC, and she was shocked when I told her that I hadn't ever had one. They're made of corn flour, and stuffed with cheese and other excellent foods... as simple as they sound, they're a wonderful treat.

We went to a Salvadorian restaurant around the corner from our house, and it was definitely an experience when I was the minority in the room and could feel it. I was with my fellow gringas as we marched in a line led by Eva into the restaurant. Lots of weird looks and side glances, followed by Spanish conversation that I couldn't understand, and we were seated. Eva had to order for me, because though so many of my fellow Americans speak Spanish, I have yet to learn and am still that white girl who doesn't know how to communicate, though not for lack of trying.

Eva ordered me a really yummy fruit juice, and while I already forget the word for it, I remember that it's from the fruit that cashews come from. It was surprisingly sweet, and tasted like pineapple juice... it was a big hit. I again followed Eva's advice and ordered 3 papusas- one plain cheese, and two beef and cheese, though I meant to get three different ones. I was flustered by not knowing how to communicate, and I told Eva a different thing than what I actually wanted. Regardless, the papusas were delicious, and it was a really interesting experience to not be able to communicate with my waitress.

I felt like I was five again, so dependent on someone else to get what I needed. I felt guilty for not knowing how to ask for what I wanted. My few murmured "gracias"es were not enough- I couldn't connect with another human being, and I felt dumb for it. It gave me insight into how so many people feel every day when they're trying to get things done that they need to get done: describing their ailments at a health clinic, asking for food at a pantry or restaurant, or describing their lives at an intake desk at any one of the many social services agencies in Houston. My awkward yet delicious experience opened my eyes to just how much of a role English has in terms of success in the US.

It's given me an extra push as a grammar teacher, and has opened my eyes to the prejudices around me. I'm working on my Spanish again, because if I want to be able to help my students and interact with their families, then I need to communicate in a language in which they feel comfortable. English, with all its irregularities and spellings that don't make sense, is a complicated language.

As I sit here observing John's "Hyphenated Americans" class on 9/11, it's a little overwhelming. Today is always a hard day for me, and I think as I get older and have a deeper understanding of what happened, it gets harder. Experiencing 9/11 in Texas as compared to on the East Coast is certainly different due to the physical separation from the attacks, but also because of the people here. So many people here have actively chosen to make America their country, and they see the attacks in a different light. Today, the seniors are discussing a prompt: What's more powerful, love or hate?

Always, love.

Day By Day

I'm trying to do less of a day-to-day update type of post, and one that's more topical, so here goes! I usually like posting that way because it gives me a way to reflect on the past few weeks and have a chance to really think about more than just what I did yesterday.

I've been thinking a lot about faith obviously as I've been here, and just like going to Kenya, or Italy, or Ireland, or Providence, mass here in Houston is different than mass at home. The music is different, the preaching styles are different, and the way people go to church is different. Over the past few weeks, we've definitely been "church shopping," but I think we've finally found one we like and will continue to go to.

During the shopping process, you notice things about mass. I have noticed that Catholic mass here has a distinct Protestant flavor, which honestly isn't that much of a surprise here in the deep south. People dress up way more than we do at home. It could be that I'm used to my college kid 10:30 PM masses (which by the way, I miss, and I was thinking of you all last night!), but everyone here gets very dressed up- some ladies wear hats! It's nice, because we do it too (not the hats), and it makes going to church more of an outing than something you simply do every week. It brings some of the formality back, and it makes us aware that we're going somewhere special.

I have also noticed the influence on the preaching style of the different priests whose homilies I have heard since I've been here. They sound more like southern Baptist preachers than Catholic priests, and I'm saying this having been to mass in several different places. Fr. Martinez, the Jesuit who is President of Cristo Rey, has an especially loud and engaging voice, and his homilies most remind me of being at mass in New Orleans. He uses the same inflection and tone as we see in many movies about the south, and I still think it's funny that that stereotype is actually true.

The music is also very much influenced by protestant traditions. We have been going to mass at St. Anne's, where the choir wears robes, and we each have a St. Anne's songbook in the pews. This also has all the readings for the year- it's a bound book with a hard cover, and it makes sense if you think about it, but it's still so funny to have a nice songbook instead of the new one every year. The music style is different from home. I don't recognize a lot of the songs, which is rare, and they all have a lot of slides and connected notes. The tempo is a bit slower and the beat is more of a march, and I find the lyrics to be less poetic. It's just different, but I like it!

I like going to mass at St. Anne's because there is a real diversity of people at mass. Lots of young married couples, lots of families, older people, and then there's us, who are somewhere in between. We feel comfortable there, and are beginning to be involved with the Young Adults group that's really active. We're still settling in, and having one place to go to church is helping with that.